Mothers Day 2018

Mothers Day Musing 2018

Sense of humor. A trait that varies between people.

Mine would fall under dark and sarcastic most of the time. I enjoy a good irony too.

In honor of Mother’s Day I thought I would share a story that my mother would enjoy.

My mother is a life-long dog owner. Her central fur baby at the moment is a squirrely-eyed Australian Blue Heeler Cattle something-or-other named Ellie. Ellie is a sweetheart and a smart herd dog. She can bring goats around and separate specific goats from the herd on command. In her leisure time Ellie loves chewing on stuffed animals. She doesn’t chew them as much as eviscerate them in a violent shaking rage but first she does something rather peculiar; she removes their eyes.

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Monkey no see monkey no do. 

Every. Single. One.

The fact that she starts with the eyes disturbs me for some reason. The idea that she doesn’t want them to see the horrors they are about to endure. Some real Jeepers Creepers kind of stuff.

Now as you can imagine, feeding a habit of stuffed animals is not cheap. If Ellie eats the eyes of one hapless victim each week then she will need fifty two sacrifices to satisfy her bloodlust. Buying brand new stuffed animals would be a big commitment. Luckily, there is a place that supplies this habit at a reduced rate. Goodwill.

That is where the real hilarious part starts for me.

I remember cleaning out things from our garage a few years ago. We had a large box full of stuffed animals that we needed to send away. The sentimental attachment was too strong to allow us to just throw them away. We felt that our children had enjoyed these toys and loved them and that maybe they still held the power of love for some other, less fortunate children. So… we donated them to Goodwill.

I think of Toy Story and the fear and trepidation that toys experience moving from one home to another. Imagine if the Velveteen Rabbit had been donated to Goodwill only to be brought home to a cute cuddly dog who promptly ripped out his eyes and scattered his stuffing all around the living room.

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Love is blind.

It made me giggle. That’s where my humor lives.

And you know who gave me that?

My mom. Happy Mother’s Day!!!

To all the moms out there. This one is for you. You’re welcome. Thanks for putting up with the rest of us.

-Underdaddy to the rescue.